Frustrated Trump Consults Fox & Friends on How to Make Gun Problem Go Away – Gets Terrible Advice

Reports from the White House indicate that President Trump has been more frustrated than usual during his 57th consecutive week of disaster, controversy, allegations, and critical missteps. But this time the president’s frustrations stem from an issue he thought would have gone away by now. An aide, wishing to remain anonymous, tells Probably Legit, “Usually when there is a shooting we can tell people we are praying for them and then establish a narrative that works with our donor’s beliefs until people forget about it, but for some reason this one is just different. At least we’ve been able to avoid some Russia questions, but now people are expecting Trump to do something about guns.”

And the aide is right. As pointed out by many, the Republican response to mass shootings has typically been to send thoughts and prayers via a tweet and then to condemn the shooter as a mentally ill criminal while simultaneously pivoting to a rigorous defense of the right to purchase guns. But with the GOP in control of the House, the Senate, and the presidency, people are beginning to cry foul in regards to what they feel are empty words and the hypocrisy of that narrative. And now, as always, Trump is seeking guidance from the most powerful show in the world, Fox & Friends, on how to solve America’s mass shooting crisis.     

But will America be safer with policy enacted from the ramblings and exhausted suggestions from a morning TV show on its 10th consecutive day of coverage? On Friday, Trump quoted Steve Doocy directly when he issued multiple tweets stating, “There’s never been a mass shooting in a prison. Maybe we could have fencing with barbed wires and armed guards in towers at every school. Or maybe I could make a law that says all clothes in America must now be bulletproof? Would that be good? Or maybe each child could be issued a paintball gun. With a lot of paintball guns shooting, it might slow active shooters down. We could maybe put a yellow marking on the paintball guns so police officers could identify between good kids and mentally ill sicko shooters. But then a sicko shooter might also put a yellow marking on their gun… but, it will all work itself out in the law or whatever. You’ll be safer than ever. Believe me.”

Will this time be different? A fed up nation waits.

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